smells like grace...

When I think of the places I've been and the mistakes I've made I am truly grateful to be where I am.
A few days ago, I walked in from teaching all day and realized I beat Bryant home. I scurried around to get the house picked up and the breakfast dishes done before my sweet husband was to walk in the door fifteen minutes later. I lit a bunch of candles and opened all the windows so fall would flow in. He walked in the door just minutes before I was done and said "it smells like pine in here...what is that?" I grinned my cheezy grin (the one when I'm trying to be funny) and said, oh that...that's grace!

Funny thing- it took me back to tutoring this summer for a wealthy Plainsboro family, for a little boy who hated reading because he has extreme adhd. I love challenges and by the end of the summer he was excited about reading and wouldn't stop reading even street signs while he was in the car. It was one of those experiences that is so fulfilling you can't even put it into words. Well at the end of the summer his mom (who works every day in NYC) bought me this $45 set of four votive candles from a boutique. One happens to be named "grace" and that is what Bryant smelled when he walked in the door.

Since then I have smelled grace often (not the candle) and it brings a smile to my face every time remembering just how much I have to be thankful for.

Born-Again Blogger

I'm online people......hello? hell-o?
So I am joining the blogging world- kinda surprising for a girl who gets the time to blow dry her hair twice a week (in a good week). Why? Because I love to write and I suck at staying in touch with people....even my family. Being that I will be a "pastor's wife" in approximately seven months this is the first act of admittance that I will most likely never live near any of the individuals that would be on my top 10 list. Also because I feel old...and this is a remedy of sorts. Funny thing, I'm writing completely blind of the audience who will read this.

John 3 -
So I was really hung up on this "born again" verse. I despise the arrogant hint of those words and the regret of my inability to agree with a well-known verse in the bible. Born again.... like I'm the chosen lucky one, in the special in-crowd Christian group. It leaves an irritating ringing in my ears and makes me feel unapproachable. I'd prefer to say "yea, I'm religious"-which doesn't explain that God is the biggest part of my heart and life. I don't feel born again, although I know that I make my decisions based on a different set of truths than the large part of the world. This is how it was for me my whole life...being born the first time into a family of "born-againers". I can't even begin to put myself in the shoes of an unbeliever facing those words "are you born again".
I like to be different and to do the unexpected; yet I have a love/hate relationship regarding the spontaneity of God....and the way the spirit moves in my life is definitely more like a hurricane than the wind.

I've never had difficulty talking about my faith -I was the Kindergartener in a public school making all eight of the kids around my lunch table pray before eating every day. Yet facing the unchosen role included in being Bryant's wife is becoming a clear reality for me (something which is usually the butt of sarcastic humor).... with the title of pastor's wife can come unexpected blessings.
So this week I realized that perhaps God allows others to be born again....the converted Christian who has a major lifestyle change as an adult or the lamb who strayed from the rest of the flock.
I was blessed this week to be asked by a co-worker if she could come to bible study and church with me. So for her, "born again" could be a celebratory descriptor.
I was blessed by a friend's response to "are you born again".....a simple "Jesus is my Lord and Savior".